Justification

I'm sitting on my bed right now and after thinking for awhile about things that have happened recently, I feel like it is just me and God in everything I do. When I do not let him come with me places though, I am very alone and I struggle. I know that I should not ever go a second without him but sometimes I just get caught up and get sidetracked. This is something I need to work on and I need to be more diligent at working on things that I have set in place. It does me no good to point out areas I need to work on if I am not going to actually do anything about it. You know, if you smell and should take a shower, you more than likely are going to take a shower so that you can be clean and smell good. In the same way, if things are not working out and things are not getting any better, something needs to be done in order to make things change. Sometimes I feel like I am running my race alone with nobody backing me, it seems as if I only have God to hold onto and that is a good thing but in this world my support comes from God and from the people around me. People encourage me but I guess the problem is that I am not open enough when it comes to telling people what are going on. As I write this, I am convicting myself of closing myself off from others and seeing that it is not them who are the problem but I am the one who is not allowing people to help me. I am not telling people what is going on because I feel like it is none of their business. When it comes to salvation and making sure we are straight with God, we need to be as open as possible and not allow ourselves to keep things under wraps. We hurt ourselves because we are not letting people see everything that there is to us, people cannot understand the mystery that is me if I do not allow them to see what is underneath and what Christ is doing as well as what I am doing in response to that.

I think that I found the perfect verse for myself tonight and I am going to write it down and post it next to my bed because I need to be reminded of things more often than I already am. I am going to start making changes that are going to help me throughout the day and I am going to let God in 24/7 100% of the time. In Proverbs 30:12 it is stated, "There are those who are pure in their own eyes and yet are not cleansed of their filth." I am not saying that I am an evil person or my life is filled with garbage but I have not gotten rid of some things that have been on my heart and I have not given them up. They are pulling me down and even though I see myself as completely whole and pure sometimes, deep down there is that stuff lurking and waiting to pull me down again. This is precisely why I am going to make changes in effort to eliminate this stuff from my life. Most coaches will tell you that being well conditioned helps in the final innings/quarter of a game and that is when everyone needs to step up their game. Well for me, its the closing quarter of the first game of the year and I need to step up and make the decisions that are going to close out this portion of my walk with God and is going to allow me to reach new levels. You cant win the prize at the end if you do not work at making adjustments and finding ways to fix things when what you are doing is not working. God is our coach and he is pushing us to the end in hopes that we will find a way to win the game and start bringing fans to the games so that we can make a difference in the community and those around us. If you give up or if you do not find a way to adjust, then you find yourself on the bench and then you might because things just are not working out the way you planned. I hope this never happens and that we all keep pressing toward the prize. Remember, it is not how you view yourself and how good you think you are, but it is all measured under God's standards.

Today has been a good but challenging day and I am excited to see what God has for me coming up. I am working on giving everything over to him but I tend to want to control some things. I know this is at tough thing to do so I am going to keep working and striving to do all that I can for his kingdom. Please continue to pray for me.

God Bless,

Joseph Robinson